heart shaped failures

I wish I knew why I have such a bad habit of lying. I don't see any gain from it, yet it happens on the daily. I'm sorry if I mislead you, you seem really genuine and it wasn't fair. Too much is on my mind to concentrate. I'm not cooking tonight since my dad volunteered and it's a good break out of the kitchen. I have a cake to do for a friend for Thursday, she's raffling it off or something to raise money for the american cancer society. Still haven't thought of a concept yet but probably will deal with the lameness of the made up holiday Valentine's day. ugh. I feel less creative lately... it may be the weather it may just be everything that is on my mind but I wish I could have another medium to express myself. Maybe next quarter I'll pick up a graphic design class to mix it up. Back to weather, I have some pretty kick ass pictures I took on my phone of the mountains and cloud breaks (not professional, just admirable) all three where taken from my truck and on different days, but all of them where on the way back from school, btw another reason I like living in the middle of nowhere, the long streach of road you take home. I really just love that time alone to reflect on what I have done that day and what I could do improve on and what decisions I've made that could have been better off as ideas, but yeah I love my little ass town :). My birthday is around the corner the big 2-1. I don't know why I am so excited for it, but like any of my other birthdays I'm always super stoked about it. Idk I just hope me and matt could be together, so it wouldn't feel as lame as it was last year. I could honestly say that I missed my other half and my body could feel the void. Well enough rambling. I just hope I get a respond to an email I sent out last night... sorry.